Wednesday, January 14, 2009

Sea Kittens!

So, we all know PETA, right? And how they want to save the world's creatures, no matter how ugly, scaly, slimy or tasty they are? Well, they now have a brand new plan for stopping people from plundering the worlds oceans. Here is there announcement of their new campaign:

"People don't seem to like fish. They're slithery and slimy, and they have eyes on either side of their pointy little heads—which is weird, to say the least. Plus, the small ones nibble at your feet when you're swimming, and the big ones—well, the big ones will bite your face off if Jaws is anything to go by.

"Of course, if you look at it another way, what all this really means is that fish need to fire their PR guy—stat. Whoever was in charge of creating a positive image for fish needs to go right back to working on the Britney Spears account and leave our scaly little friends alone. You've done enough damage, buddy. We've got it from here. And we're going to start by retiring the old name for good. When your name can also be used as a verb that means driving a hook through your head, it's time for a serious image makeover. And who could possibly want to put a hook through a sea kitten?"

So, of course what we had to do was make our very own sea kitten! Meet...



Create Your Own Sea Kitten at peta.org!

Man oh man, nothing has EVER made me want to eat sushi more than this campaign. Just think of it- raw sea kitten! Or you could have sea kitten sticks! Or kitten steaks! The possibilities are endless! Thank you PETA... thank you.

Until next time...

"Do not tell fish stories where the people know you; but particularly, don't tell them where they know the fish."
More Maxims of Mark, Johnson, 1927

1 comment:

Ben said...

In that same vein of "what are they smoking", I offer a PETA news release from last september in whih they suggest replacing cow's milk in ice cream with human milk.

http://www.peta.org/mc/NewsItem.asp?id=11993

It's also possible that, as a result of the sea kitten campaign, people will decide that, if sea kittens are so very, very delicious, land kittens must be equally tasty...